Dish Upon a Star

Archive for March 2011

He got a girl pregs, unleashed the swimmers once again out of wedlock, though given the stipend he gets from Brits, I imagine he’ll stay single forever. It’s #5 for K-Fed. After watching the celebrity weight loss show, he didn’t seem like a bad guy, just too young and making crappy choices. Elizabeth Banks is a new mother via gestational carrier (the sanest option in the world, especially for those of us–Dish–who can’t bear a second of discomfort, but will I have this option? Nooooooooo), a blessing since she’d been trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant. Congrats to EB and her family! Less fertile seems to be Mad Men‘s future. I’m over Don, the sassy Scientologist and the redheaded float.

Judge Judy was in the hospital, feeling woozy from “intestinal discomfort” but is allegedly fine. This happens to me when I eat spinach.

The Fates always conspire to keep Dish from direct contact with Duran Duran. Wanted to participate in live Twitter Q&A, had brilliant, learned question for DD but Twitter is “over capacity.” Will have to live on the fumes of 24 years ago when John Taylor told a high school acquaintance (I won’t explain circumstances–only that she told him I was a big DD freak) that he liked my name. It could have been a big lie.

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News about Gale Harold’s new casting broke my silence. The new king of the CW, he joins the cast of The Secret Circle, about one of Dish’s favorite topics: Salem witches. He plays the leader of a coven (I just fainted). Also in the cast, Natasha Henstridge. Do we dare hope for a sweaty coupling on pentacle shaped sheets with the scent of Cleopatra oil wafting through the air? They are both too good-looking not to make out. At least once.

Not sure when the show starts but DVR just in time!

No Dish today. Am cleaning and packing up the apartment–all my stuff from 14 years of NYC. Has to be done in record time and with busy schedules. Feel pretty overwhelmed and alone in this effort.

Nurse Jackie was pretty lame last night.

…let me fall asleep. 5am is no way to live. dish hates insomnia. typed covertly using husband’s fab ipadding.

Dish JUST got rid of HBO (to justify getting DVR) so missed Mildred Pierce last night. I will rent it, even though first reviews from friends (except for JJ) have been poor, saying that it’s boring. Joan Crawford is tough to top or even equal.

Fellow Duranies, Simon Le Bon threw out his back right before his performance tonight–so had to re-SHedule. Wonder what tipped off the spasm. Today’s lesson: Stilettos can be murder on the lumbar region.

I’m over them as a couple but Scarlett allegedly brought Sean Penn to Reese’s wedding. Can you imagine all those celebrities using the same bathroom? The artifacts one could collect–dizzying. Though Dish has her boundaries.

Suckerpunch did poorly at the box office and not sure why this makes me happy. Probably because it looks and feels too derivative of Sin City/300/The Spirit/The Watchmen?

Dishbrother continues to torture me with Charlie Sheen packages. Oh, that didn’t sound good. Can you believe? A whole few days without him in the headlines. HAS BEEN.

Moving day coming soon. We are rechannelling to larger quarters. To combat this intense stress, will watch the premiere of the always excellent Nurse Jackie. The Godiva is gone. What’s left in the medicine cabinet?

…that Duran Duran is in NYC right now. And so is Dish. I’m too adult to do any kind of spying but still.

Back to Virginia Woolf and her headaches.

Reese Witherspoon got married. There is no drama attached so not sure it’s newsworthy. Robert Downey Jr. and Renee Zellweger attended–though not together. Baby bump watch within a few months. Reese does make cute mini-me babies.

Should I get the new Jennifer Aniston fragrance? Only drawback: says there’s Jasmine in it. In a romantic fervor, wanting to smell like a Southern brothel, I got some Jasmine oil to slather on myself; sadly, it stank like a Penn Station toilet. But in novels, the hero gets whiff of heroine’s hair and it’s ALWAYS Jasmine wafting into his nostrils. Must investigate at Sephora. I like citrus better.

Who am I kidding? I wear men’s cologne.