Dish Upon a Star

Triumph

Posted on: March 24, 2011

Fresh off her breakup with Justin Timberlake, Jessica Biel might be rebounding with Gerard Butler, the one who sweats beer. He might not really sweat beer, but when I look at pictures of him, I smell stale hops. Stinky and gorgeous, Gerard is there for starlets when they been dumped. He probably touches their faces with his hands (blocking visage from camera, keeping focus on himself–you’re the worst offender, Richard Gere!) and makes sweet, beer sweaty love to them at the Chateau MarMOUNT. If you ask me, lookswise, Gerard is far less offensive than wormy Timberlake. Who am I kidding, I almost fainted when I saw fresh-faced Gerard swaggering around my neighborhood. JT is quite talented, as is Gerard when he tries. Biel did a nice job in The Illusionist though the rest of her repertoire is crap. Britney, Jessica and Cameron all spent 3 years with Justin and all three starlets look a bit tired. Wonder if Britney ever effed Gerard. Yes, I think about these things.

The Real Housewives of D.C. has been canceled. Good! They were either boring or trash.

If Duran Duran had lived during the time of Caesar, they would have been crowned with laurels and carried through the streets. Their Unstaged concert directed by David Lynch was brilliant–pure joy to watch, artistic, modern, and shiver-giving to those of us who love talent. Even Simon’s rare flat notes “looked” great. The band and Lynch did something very special.

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