Dish Upon a Star

Boinking to Produce the Messiah

Posted on: April 12, 2011

So many pregnancies–some planned, some seem conceived in a Hollywood loo. With apocalyptic 2012 on its way, it seems as if stars are furiously trying to create our next savior with this rash of pregnancies. I embrace this new herd of superior star-progeny…but I also embrace the Great Beyond, where Elizabeth Taylor has gone for her permanent vacation. Psychic Sylvia Brown alleges Heaven is 72 degrees with the deceased hovering three feet off the ground. Sounds much like Winter Park, Florida though it was my hair hovering three feet above my head this past weekend.

New babies: If only to show us some meat on her spindly arms, Tori Spelling is pregnant with baby #3. I miss her show when it was just her and Dean going through “hell” due to their hectic schedules (and Dean’s volcanic farting). I’ll show you a hectic schedule. In strange couplings, party girl Kimberly Stewart is having Benicio Del Toro’s spawn. Odd to think he’s only a year old than I am and looks about 60. I had high hopes for his career.

All you new babymamas, remember to PUSH. Oh wait, you’ll probably have scheduled C sections (Not that there’s anything wrong with that. In fact, it seems sane to Dish). Never mind.


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